Oh hey, it’s 2012! You know what that means? I’ve been writing this blog for an entire year. ONE WHOLE YEAR. Well, minus the 3 months I didn’t write anything. Shut up.
To celebrate my anniversary, I thought I’d do the obligatory “Ten lessons learned /review of 2011” post.
Join me, will you?
1. I am able to run 13 miles without dying. Sure, I’ve permanently damaged my knee, but I have an awesome medal!
2. My ex-boyfriend William Shatner is an a**hole. But his fans are hilarious. Also, where the f**k is my High Council membership card?? Klingon slackers.
3. I became addicted to Words with Friends in 2011. Seriously, its nerd crack. I knew I had a problem when I tried to start a new game and got denied because I had too many games open. Next year’s 2012 review will most likely contain something about my WWF intervention.
4. I foiled the Mini-Assassin’s plans to kill me for an entire year, HOORAY!
5. There are people in the world who do not like me (GASP!). I know, you're SHOCKED. I mean, who wouldn't like me? I'm a mother f**king princess!?! Alas, it is true. I've learned that people who talk about others simply do not have enough to do in their own lives. To these people, may I suggest doing something more productive with your time- like playing Words with Friends? It’s cracktastic!
6. Great news, the government didn’t shut down and the world didn’t come to an end. PHEW. I apologize to all who have still not received their Pegasuarases (Thank you Jillsmo for confirming that ‘Pagasaurauses’ is indeed the plural form of ‘Pegasus’). You wouldn’t BELIEVE the cost of shipping mythical beasts these days.
7. If Edward from Twilight, Ming-Ming, DJ Lance, and Dora’s backpack entered into a battle to the death, Kevin Bacon would win. I wrote this post while watching the movie “Footloose” for the first time ever. Kevin Bacon’s got moves you’ve never seen.
8. If you dress up a Craig’s List posting, you can sell ANYTHING. Someone offered me not only full price for my fancy black pleather couches- they were willing to throw their husband in for free. Hooray plural marriage!
9. I’ve got nothing. Come on, did you really expect me to finish this list?! I didn’t blog ANYTHING for months; you know I’m a quitter! Shut up.
10. Um, why are you still looking at this list? Don’t you have anything better to do? Apparently you’ve listened to nothing I've said about Words with Friends.
TTFN Blog Universe. I haven’t taken a shower yet this year, I suppose I should do something about that. Happy anniversary to me.
PS I apologize to all who have left comments over the last few months, I had to remove them to rid myself of Intense Debate. I've said it once, I'll say it again- if Intense Debate were a person, I'd punch it in the face.
PPS I (heart) Al Gore. I just thought you should know.