Need a Chris Brown birthday card? Of course you do.

It’s about that time of the year again where I pretend that I am SUPER excited to turn yet another year older.  You know, that time of the year when people give you cards with ultra hilarious messages that are usually accompanied by an image of an old person doing something equally as hilarious?  Or maybe the card has a sweet and tender message accompanied by some form of soft baby animal.  I don’t know about you, but most greeting cards make me either roll my eyes or vomit in my mouth a little bit.  ANYONE can be a greeting card writer, which is why they are so bad.  Really, all you need to establish your career in this field are the following qualifications:

1.       You cannot be funny.

2.       You have to have a pulse.

3.       You must think that kittens are the most adorable creatures on the planet.

In my new-found old age, I’ve decided that if I am going to complain about something, I need to offer a solution.  My biggest problem with greeting cards is that they just seem so… INSINCERE.  My solution?  My NEW LINE of greeting cards… “Keepin' it real” by PMuff.   

Do you need a Chris Brown birthday card?  Of course you do.

Looking for that card for your rebellious teenager with just the right amount of "nag"?  Look no further!

What doctor's office DOESN'T need a hilarious wine IV card to send to their patients?

Here's one for that passive-aggressive spiteful sibling in your life (click to zoom)!

And of course, a birthday card for any special princesses you may know.  Secretly, princesses LOVE birthday cards even though sometimes they tell you differently. 

Princesses are SO high-maintenence.

TTFN, 

AMo